I Wanna Know What Turns You On

The indecency lectures seem to have sprung interesting posts from my fellow classmates. I am of the mind that problems arise from poor parenting. Children become more curious about sex and pornography when the subject is completely ignored, or when they are informed that they come from the stork.

As a child, I was very interested in the ever-present question, “Where do babies come from?” To this day I thank my parents for being open enough with me to be able to take out a book from the library. I was about four. It was an illustrated children’s book that explained the mechanics of sex and the biology of pregnancy. It was also in Hebrew. I do not know if there is an equivalent in English, however if there isn’t one, I would strongly recommend it.

The lack of such a book would be indicative of our society: one that is closed and does not talk about such intimate things as sex, thereby making it taboo. There are countless advertisements and commercials about how parents should talk to their children about smoking, drugs, and alcohol. Why is sex any different? For the child curious to learn about sex, human sexuality, and the human anatomy the internet can be a scary place. A simple search, even if for purely educative purposes, will yield a plethora of pornography sites. I was lucky enough to have a home that was warm and open, where no question was avoided, no matter how potentially “embarrassing”. In this light, my parents told me that if I was ever interested in searching online for anything sex related, that they would be more than willing to sit with me and help me search. They would help me pick sites that were safe for my young eyes to look at, and then I would be free to browse those sites.

One might argue that once they left I could do whatever I wanted. Anyone who uses the internet, however, also knows how to track websites visited; knowing this, why would I look at something my parents requested I not look at? Open parents would also explain why this material is inappropriate, and not just because, “I’m too young”, but rather because I was not experienced enough in this arena to understand that much of pornography is fake, and that the attitudes conveyed by the “actors” are not ones that should be learned before learning how a sexual relationship should be handled.

As a result of my postive experiences, I believe that if parents opened up to their children, giving reasons, teaching, and not being embarrassed to discuss one of the most basic of human needs then we wouldn’t have to worry as much about curious children who purposely or intentionally find material that is unsuitable for their eyes.